[00:00:00.000] - Speaker 1

Welcome to the Grit Reapers, the podcast for aspiring online entrepreneurs that cuts through all the crap in the online business world and dishes out the raw and real truth about what it really takes to have a successful online business. No sugar coating, no get-rich-quick schemes, just honest advice with a healthy dose of humor and hope.

[00:00:23.620] - Speaker 2

We're your hosts, Gail and Candice, two online entrepreneurs who've been there done that and lived to tell the tale. So if you're looking for straight talk, practical tips, and the occasional reality check, to get your online business moving, you're in the right place. Let's get down to business.

[00:00:46.400] - Speaker 1

So welcome, everybody. Welcome to our listeners. We're so happy to have you here at the Reepers podcast. So, Gail, today's episode, we are talking about a topic that you I could speak about, I think, till the cows come home. We speak about it so much offline in our personal conversations. Whenever we're together, this is coming up. Do you want to share with our listeners what it is that you and I are speaking so much about and why we thought we actually have to we have to record something about this?

[00:01:21.460] - Speaker 2

Sure. Thanks, Cans. And hello to everybody. We are seeing a lot, and it's not really just now. We've been seeing it for years just being in this online place that people are like coming into the different groups that we are in and saying, Guys, I need some help. Things are not working the way I thought it would or the way I was told it would. And I'm just at a loss. I just don't know what to do. I'm following I've this process or that process like to a T, and I'm just not getting people. People are not putting their hands up. I'm doing this and it's crickets. I've just launched and nothing, no buyers. I think people are just feeling like, What is going on? What am I doing wrong? So, Cans, you and I chat and you gave me the analogy of of The Amazing Race. And I wonder if you could just tell our listeners, because when you spoke to me about that, I was like, Oh my gosh, absolutely 100 %. So do you want to just share that analogy that we spoke about?

[00:02:45.460] - Speaker 1

So I don't know, maybe the listeners aren't familiar, but there used to be this show on TV called The Amazing Race. I was obsessed with it. I loved watching it. And basically, there were teams put together. So it was like a mother and a son or two best friends or partners. And so you would enroll in this thing in a team, and you would go all around the world collecting clues. And obviously, the last team to come in got eliminated. And as you mentioned, Facebook groups or in the little mastermind communities or communities that we are in from signature programs or wherever we are, we were seeing people saying things like you've just mentioned. I followed the process to a tee. I don't understand. What am I doing wrong? This isn't working. And truthfully, my heart actually, I really feel when I reposts like this for these people because it is totally disillusioning and defeating. But I thought about the amazing race because I thought it's pretty much like if you and I, Gail, if you and I, you know who we like. We are the team. Yes, we're in this race and we are pumped.

[00:04:03.190] - Speaker 1

We're so excited. We are convinced we are going to win the amazing race. We are in this helicopter. The pilot turns to us and he's like, All right, girls, put on your backpacks. Parachutes are in there. Like, go. We are so excited. We just jump and we land in the middle of the Amazon forest. I say to you, Gail, how amazing is this? I actually have a map. I managed to get my hands on a map because the clue we got in the helicopter was like, you've got to go find this waterfall. That is where the next clue is. I said to you, I've got the map, girl. I know where to go. I mean, you would agree that that would put us at a huge advantage if we had some direction to where we were going. And not only a map showing us the way, but a map that also gave us little tips on what to avoid, what paths not to go down, even though they look and maybe are telling us, Hey, come this way. It's going to save you 5 hours or whatever. The map is telling us, Don't fall for that.

[00:05:13.930] - Speaker 1

That's not actually true, whatever the case is. Most people would agree that would be a huge advantage. But what I've seen and with the clients I've worked with, and I know the clients you have worked with, is that isn't what is happening. They are jumping They are wide-eared and bushy-tailed and super enthusiastic, convinced this is going to happen for them. They hit the ground and they just start running. Running and running and running, going down all kinds of paths that are risky and dangerous. Maybe they fall a couple of times, bleeding, battered and bruised. After going at it at full speed, just running and running for hours Hours and hours and hours, they realized they'd actually run in a huge circle on their back where they started. And worse for where, because now they're tired and they're bleeding and not convinced this is actually something they want to be doing. So that's the one person. It's like hit the ground running, no map, no plan, went and did all kinds of stuff that actually wasn't necessary and has come back to square one. The other Another person hits the ground, doesn't have a map, doesn't start running, but sees someone who looks the part.

[00:06:38.160] - Speaker 1

It's like God. And you're focused in like, how I can get Telling you, I know the way. I know the way, just follow me. And you saying, Okay, but I have to get to the waterfall. And he says, No, I know. I'm going to take you to the waterfall. And because he looks the part and he looks fit, and he is basically where you want to be, you think this is a no-brainer, off I go, and we're following the guide. A while into the journey, he's taking you on a path. You are like, I don't know if I can do that. That looks like a really steep hill. I don't have great knees. I don't have the right gear. He's telling you, Don't worry. Even if you don't have the right gear, you can do this. You think, Well, he's done it before. He's telling me he's taken other people to the waterfall. I'm going to trust him off I go. Even though you have this gut feeling, like into the hark, I don't know if this was a great idea, you keep going. He's very charismatic. He's super engaging Really interesting. You really actually like him as a person, but you're just not convinced he's actually taking the right way.

[00:08:07.540] - Speaker 1

Then you realize, Oh, my God, he's taking me to his damn waterfall. This is not the waterfall I needed to be at. Again, we see this all the time, which is people come into the space, and of course they do because they've been listening to podcasts or following other people on socials or YouTube or wherever they're finding these guides. Of course, you come in and you are convinced that this person, because he's telling you or she's telling you, I know the way. Hey, I've done this before. Just come with me. Actually, what lands up happening is because you don't have all the information, you don't have a map, you haven't spoken to people that have actually done this amazing race before who are actually going to tell you the truth. I know that he's going to talk a big game, but don't We did it, I did it. This is what happened to me. You land up, and actually the God has taken you down a path or to a place that might have worked for him or her, but actually it doesn't work for you. I thought to myself, this is exactly why we are seeing these kinds of posts, hearing these kinds of things from people, which is like, it's not working.

[00:09:27.430] - Speaker 1

I followed it like two at a tee. I followed with their instruction or their program or whatever the case is, and it's just not working. When I shared it with you, you and I had a really good chuckle at this. We had a good laugh because not only is it a little bit comical, but I feel like you and I are allowed to laugh because we were those people. We were the bushy odd in this super enthusiastic, thinking like, This is going to happen. We made all these mistakes. So, yeah, I mean, I know you've got a story you can share with our listeners, telling us about how putting up your hand like being there down there. Gail, tell us, what was your tactic jumping out the plane first time around? What did you do?

[00:10:20.230] - Speaker 2

Okay, so I was definitely the bright-eye, bushy-tailed, jump out of the plane, and just hit the ground running. So I I came into the online space during COVID, where a lot of people did. I've never done anything online before. I had, up until then, never even purchased anything online. I've got two offline businesses, and I had, in fact, one as a training company, and I had, in fact, created a whole online course that had taken me three years to video and cost lots of money because I just thought at that that I could take what I was doing offline and just turn it online because I wanted to reach more moms. I wanted to help more moms. And it was when I inadvertently actually fell into the online space through a free challenge, which turned out wasn't exactly free because I ended up paying 10,000 rand to join the paid program. But it introduced me to the online world. So for that, I'm very grateful. But then I then met... I realized that I had got into an e-commerce program, which I wouldn't want to do e-commerce because at that stage, I didn't even know the difference between e-commerce and the creator vibe.

[00:11:47.510] - Speaker 2

So long story short, I was introduced to a large program. In the middle of lockdown, my husband always says I was the only person he knew who spent All of my savings on a program that I was convinced was going to work without knowing anything about it, as none of my businesses were bringing in any money. But I felt deep down that it was going to add value. So jumped in, jumped out of the helicopter, hit the ground running with a guide, and just dove into it. You are very much encouraged to do something within the first 90 days. And I can understand fully why, because people who take action rather than just sitting and learning and learning and learning are the ones who can then see, get the information and everything to grow. But actually what it caused for me was more traumatic than numbers. So I did. I did a launch. I realized that I shouldn't have created the whole course, and I knew so little that I was just consuming it, and I thought I knew what I was doing. So I created a whole new program, and I launched it. I paid 10,000 rands for Facebook ads, and I got a whole lot of the wrong I went into my funnel and had to tweak it.

[00:13:18.980] - Speaker 2

And yeah, I did this launch with nothing ready of this new program and spent the entire cart open phase praying that nobody would join, literally putting it out into the universe. Please don't join. Please don't join. Please don't join. Because I was just so... I had nothing ready, and that's not the person that I am. And I felt like, How am I going to do this? But you were told to do it. And so it actually traumatized me so much that I was like, That's it. I'm not launching. I'm not doing this. I gave myself all these excuses and all these passes. I'm like, Okay, maybe I don't like this niche anymore. Maybe I'm not passionate about this niche anymore. I did a pivot. I saw the potential of the online world. I did a pivot into service providing so that I could be behind the scenes helping other people go through the process of launching, et cetera. But for me, I was like, No. It's taken four years for me to actually consider doing it again. So that was my story. And Cans, I know we bet when I was helping you with your story.

[00:14:39.860] - Speaker 2

So if you wanted to chat a little bit about your story.

[00:14:42.390] - Speaker 1

When you were talking, I was like, The other thing I always say to you is I'm convinced I had launched PTSD. It completely... That whole experience completely traumatized me. But yes, similarly, I think, again, it was out of necessity that I started investigating how I was going to take this brick and mortar business that I had into an online space. It was COVID and lockdown forced my hand. I don't know. I think I was already thinking about it because in my past life, I used to like a practice. In my past life, I had a therapy practice, a private practice. I was a clinical therapist, and I was already thinking about how can I take this knowledge and digitize it in a way that people could maybe work through on their own. It would be more helpful for them. I mean, I reckon I probably would have come around to this online world anyway, but COVID really pushed me into it. I think this is a big takeaway for me was because I was panicked. I was panicked that my business was basically like a standstill, panicking that there was no income. What was I going to I had just spent two years of my life building this yoga studio.

[00:16:06.460] - Speaker 1

It was a really panicked and desperate emotion that I was coming with. That is already not a great place to be starting from. And I think your emotions when they are really charged like that, influence the decisions you're going to make. And how, I don't want to say gullible, but I suppose how susceptible you are to believe believing what other people are telling you. I really didn't have a critical ear. I was basically looking for anyone to tell me, It's going to be okay. I'm going to show you the way. And in 90 days, you're going to make $100,000 on your first launch. I was like, Oh, my God. I am in. Again, just like every mistake in the book, I was a complete rookie, Belford, Hook, Line, and Sinka, signed up. Again, you and I have chatted about the collection of online courses we have and how many things we signed up for, how many lead magnets we've downloaded. But the thing for me was that I think knowing that I was coming to this with not the best emotional space Yes, it was influencing the decisions I made. It was influencing what I was hearing.

[00:17:19.830] - Speaker 1

But then also that I wasn't asking the right questions. Maybe it's because I didn't know what questions to ask, but I wasn't critical enough about where I was investing Investing my money and with who. I got very caught up in the bells and whistles and the shiny wrapping of the people that were guiding me, really buying into it. Again, would have been helpful to know launching is not the only way to start generating money. I was like, and I swear to you for our listeners out there, it's like this is really Gail and just bearing our stuff, telling you that's how it is. It was like both of us are Kajabi mad. We love Kajabi. We're big supporters of Kajabi. But the Kajabi world for me, I'm not saying this is how it is, but for me, it felt and still feels it's very much about launching, like challenges and webinars and launching. It was only really in the last two years that I came across an entirely non-kajabi audience who, yeah, our launch talk is part of what goes on there, but it's not the only way. It's like all of a sudden this world blew open and I was like, Would have been helpful to know this four years ago.

[00:18:48.330] - Speaker 1

Like you, just went in the deep end. Full-blown launch hired Gail to help me as a service professional, building out My challenge. Then, again, the day my launch, my card opened, doors opened, I was in what in the industry they say, a launch freefall. It was seriously the worst space to be in. I hated Every second of it because I wasn't getting signups, and everyone was like, Just hang in there.

[00:19:21.760] - Speaker 2

They come in on the last day, and I'm like, Okay.

[00:19:26.350] - Speaker 1

The last day came, and they didn't call them. I was traumatized. It was the money spent, the time and the effort, and then to really be... I mean, it's not even slept in the face, but at first, it I've kicked in the face by a fish. It felt like, kicked in the face by a bull. What the hell just happened? It was horrific. I mean, it sounds like a bit of a dramatization, but I really felt like it was a horrific experience. I think, again, if you and I summed up now, okay, so we had these experiences. This is what we are still seeing. We're still hearing people talk about it. It's not happening the way they said it would. What am I doing wrong? What's going on? Based on our experiences, Gail, what would you want our listeners? What are the takeaways? What would you want people to know if this is what they are going through?

[00:20:29.520] - Speaker 2

I think the very first thing that I would want listeners to know, and it's taken a long time for me to get to that place, is that you are not doing anything wrong. Yes, you may be following a process step by step that isn't working for you. Yes, you might have tried a specific launch and it didn't work for you. Or maybe you are seeing some success, but it's not what that you want. And it's not anything that you are doing wrong. There's things that can be improved upon. But for me, it's a process, and it's only a process and a journey that you can walk. Everything that you do, there are lessons that are going to be taught to you or lessons that you're going to learn. And from there, you take that lesson and you run with it. And don't lose yourself in other people's processes. So that's a big one for me because we so attach our worth to the end result. And if the end result doesn't work, it affects us as a person. We think there's something we did wrong. We think it's our failure. And it's actually you've got to be able to distinguish your self-worth from the goals that you have, which is difficult.

[00:21:58.710] - Speaker 2

I still battle with that. I still try very hard to detach from any results. But of course, you're always saying, Oh, what did I do wrong? Oh, is my messaging off? So it's definitely your mind is playing with you all the time. The second thing is just to manage your expectations. I came into it when I think about it with an offline community that knew me in my specific town. So yes, I was well known in the offline world, but I came in with not a single person knowing me in the online world. And then, Cans, like you say, you're like, Oh, 90 days, $100,000. Whoa. Well, but you've got no audience, you've got no list, you've got no way of getting to them. I remember when I first got my online course onto the platform, and I was like, Yo, three years of work. I was like, Okay, world, there's the Course. Mom says the course. Mom, there's the course. Remember thinking, How's anybody going to know this course is sitting here on my WordPress site? Manage your expectations, because if you don't have an audience. It takes a long time to build your audience.

[00:23:20.980] - Speaker 2

That's, I think, my two main takeaways.

[00:23:26.120] - Speaker 1

I love what you've said. I think the first point you saying, which is like, you're not doing anything wrong. This is just how it works, is again, my brain works in analogies and storytelling. I wanted to share a little thing with you. When my first son was born, we didn't cut his hair until he was three. It was, if I tell you, the curves started on his scalp. He looked like he had an Afro. I was so excited for this third birthday. We were cutting his hair, and he was petrified. He was so petrified of having his hair cut. One day, I thought, I don't know if I've ever actually told him, boy, when you cut hair, you can't feel it, so it doesn't hurt. I hadn't actually explained this is what's going to happen. This is what you we can expect, which helped him manage the feelings and the anticipation and the fantasies he was having about what was going to happen. It's the same thing. It's like, if you understand, and I really feel like it's important to find people that are going to tell you this stuff. Yes. Oh, my gosh. All of us want the bling.

[00:24:58.670] - Speaker 1

We want the Vegas lights. That's what draws us to the world. It's seeing the gods, the people, the outliers, some of them that are having these incredible successes in the houses and the I mean, you know how I go on about this, Gail. The mandatory video on the airplane, out the window. It's very influencer style stuff. Of course, we all attracted to that, but that's not the process. It's not like, Hey, world, here I am. I've got this great idea. I'm sure people are going to want it. And boom, I'm booking myself next month to Hawaii. No, that's not quite how it works. That we have to understand the process. The process is you're going to think it's linear. You're going to get in, you're going to think, Okay, nailed my niche. Tick. Got an offer. Tick. Went on socials. Tick. Okay, that's part of the process. You're going to think one thing, you're going to try it, and then you're going to realize, Okay, no, that didn't quite work like that. For me, I love what you're saying. It's like you're not doing anything wrong. It's Maybe just that you haven't got information about what this really looks like in application for 90% of us.

[00:26:23.230] - Speaker 1

I'm not saying everybody. They're always outliers, right?

[00:26:26.000] - Speaker 2

Absolutely.

[00:26:27.070] - Speaker 1

Managing your expectations, again, comes back to these guys. I'm not saying... I mean, you and I are always quite comical and satirical about this stuff. They are brilliant. They are brilliant. There is much to learn from them. But you've got to manage your expectation when you're learning from somebody who's in their 20th year of doing this. You, like Gail, when she first started, had a very successful business offline, but was brand-spanking you online. You're in day They are on year 20. Manage your expectations.

[00:27:06.390] - Speaker 2

And, Cans, I also think on that is that often these guides will tell you, This is my X year doing this. I've been doing this for seven years, but we don't hear that. We don't hear. Well, we hear, but we don't see what has happened in those seven years, everything that they've been through. We just see the result and we think, Okay, that's going to be us. Correct. I like what you said.

[00:27:36.430] - Speaker 1

It's like we're here, but we're not listening.

[00:27:39.440] - Speaker 2

Yeah, exactly.

[00:27:40.460] - Speaker 1

The other thing is, again, there's much to learn. It's like, take what you like, leave the rest, have a critical ear and have critical eyes, which is like, these guys are brilliant marketers. Why? Because they've been at it for 20 years. Their messaging is completely dialed in. They have They have launched fail, launched again, tweaked, launched again, tweaked, revisited, another offer. They've been at this so long that by the time we enter into their funnels, I have to laugh when you were in your free challenge, because the same thing happened to me. I went to my husband and I was like, Hey, oh my gosh. I'm doing this three-day free live training with XYZ, and he was like, How old are you? I was like, Why? He was like, Do you really believe anything is free? I was like, No, I promise you.

[00:28:33.810] - Speaker 2

It's free.

[00:28:35.410] - Speaker 1

There's no charge to it. I'm so green about this. I didn't realize I was in a funnel.

[00:28:42.730] - Speaker 2

Exactly. Yeah.

[00:28:44.370] - Speaker 1

And there's a hub. It's like you get sucked into this vortex. Everyone's posting, I'm in, I'm in. And you see social proof and testimonials. And it's like the glitz and the glamor and the bling. I always use that example of casinos. The music's going in the bing, bing, bing, bing, bing, and win, win, win. You're like, Oh,. Anyway, so they are good marketers. That's the other thing. You've just got to also realize, yes, it's great to be inspired by people, and it's great to learn from other people. But don't lose your mind. Don't let your emotions become so activated that your rational thinking vacates, that you're not actually thinking critically. You're not asking good questions. You're not taking your time. You're rushing to decisions. And you and I, I mean, just last week, we were saying, we saw this post and someone was saying she had, I don't know, $20 in her bank account, and she had just come up to this Really pricey signature course, convinced that in 90 days she's going to be... I can't even remember what she said. My heart, I feel like I wanted to go message her and say, don't do Do it.

[00:30:00.380] - Speaker 1

Don't spend it and put it on your credit card. You're going to get yourself into all kinds of stuff. Again, coming to the space with desperation, when you are desperate and panicked, you are not going to make good decisions, and you're going to put so much pressure on yourself. You're not going to allow yourself time. The time, like you are saying, which is if you understand the process, there's no shortcut here. You learn from doing, and you have to have time to implement, make mistakes, learn, tweak, go again. You have time to do that. My thing is just realize these people are in double digits often in their experience. There's much to learn from them, but they are also really skilled marketers. They have teams of copywriters and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. This would be my final one. No one can promise you that their way is the way.

[00:31:06.270] - Speaker 2

Great.

[00:31:07.220] - Speaker 1

If you are curious and you really want to learn about different launch methods, you want to learn about webinar strategies versus challenges, versus live trainings, versus whatever. Great. Go learn from those people. Learn. But if anyone is telling you, Follow me. I know the way. I'm going to take you to the waterfall. And then you realize this is not the waterfall I needed to get you. This is the waterfall you got to. There is no one way. And again, we only learn this stuff when we try a challenge. I mean, Gail, how funny. My challenge was for mums who have no time to cook healthy meals. So what did I do? I made a challenge at five o'clock in the afternoon. Only after that did I realize, might not have been the best time for mums who don't have a lot of time. Okay, so that wasn't a great idea. Could I try it in another way? Now I need time to run again. If you have 20 bucks in your bank, you are going to be freaking the out, right?

[00:32:26.040] - Speaker 2

Because you don't need that time.

[00:32:27.810] - Speaker 1

You're going to be starting to do all kinds of crazy shit. Like, Okay, I just need to run paid ads to this. It's like, Okay, do you know anything about paid ads? No. But this person told me if I just put a thousand back, bye. Guys, critical ears, critical eyes. You've got to have time. Perhaps, Gaely, the last thing maybe we can... Because you and I could chat about this forever. I've got to. Maybe the last thing to also just end off with is is to say that we're not here to dampen anybody's dreams. This is not what this podcast is about. We are here to say, this is durable. It's hard. It's going to require serious grit, guys. Grit like you are going to be pushed to parts of yourself that you just did not know existed. It is doable. Of course, it's doable. Entrepreneurs are driven to do this. Then we don't give up easy Great. But what we are saying is that Gail and I don't personally believe that this is just about quit your job, go all in, believe in yourself, visualize it. It's like that's all helpful. It's good. You have to have belief in yourself.

[00:33:47.160] - Speaker 1

You have to back yourself. But a lot of the time people are quitting their jobs because they are so caught up in the casino lights and the result picture of someone who's been doing this for 20 years. When you have no money, you make bad decisions. When our emotions are activated to the point where our rational brains have vacated, that is not a good space to be in any part of your life.

[00:34:19.600] - Speaker 2

Yeah, absolutely.

[00:34:22.960] - Speaker 1

We're all about the grit, and we're all about just keeping it real for people so that if this is what they want to do, that at least your eyes are open. You've got that critical thinking. You're making good decisions because you know what your options are. You're speaking to people that are honest with you. Honest, because I don't know. I just feel like it's better to be disillusioned and know the truth than to be chasing a fantasy and in constant emotional turmoil because you're confused and lost and you just don't know where to turn.

[00:34:59.920] - Speaker 2

Yeah, true. Okay, so this was a big episode, I think. And one, as Candice said, we chat about a lot because we do see a lot of people struggling with this. I think people have this weird thinking that an online business is somehow different to building an offline business, that an online My business is somehow easier. In many cases, in many respects, I feel like it is harder because you are shouting to people online who don't really often shout back or engage back for you to know that you are actually on the right path. Whereas when you are face-to-face with people, you get all that feedback. The online business, Candice and I are both successful in our businesses. I finally, after four years, felt like I'm ready to launch again, and I've started. I've got a number of programs running, and now I'm still in the testing phase, but everything that we do, we test, we get the data back, we look at it, we tweak it, and I don't feel as traumatized as I did the first time. I think just manage your expectations and Cans, if I remember, we do actually have a resource for our listeners.

[00:36:40.550] - Speaker 1

We put together what we think is a top 10 reality checklist. If you're starting out or you're in your first two years, or maybe you've just loved every word of what we've just said and you've been nodding along thinking, Finally, someone is saying it or whatever the case is, we think that these are our top 10 reality checks. If you're in the online space, stuff that you should know about starting or running an online business. You can go and grab that. We will pop the link in the notes or somewhere on this post or wherever this is appearing, you will see a link somewhere. But otherwise, it is www. Thegriftreapers. Com/top10realitycheck. We don't even want your email address. This is not an opt-in. We're not going to flood you with an email sequence. It's right there on the page for you to read immediately. There's also a download if you want to grab that. I would suggest plastering that everywhere that you are, like your cupboard, your mirror, your car, and just remind yourself of these things. But that was fantastic. Thanks for listening. We'll catch you next week for our next episode.

[00:38:02.550] - Speaker 2

Yep, and in the meantime, just keep on going. Grit and determination is what is going to get you to your goals. Absolutely.

[00:38:12.400] - Speaker 1

Thanks, guys.

[00:38:13.750] - Speaker 2

Thanks. Bye.